That has got to be rubbish (sorry Ms Ross)!

You can just imagine the scene at your local church - the grand unveiling ceremony - a statue of Christ crucified on a .....chair!

"Well we did not have room for him standing up and the cross was a bit wide so we thought a nice rocking chair would suit better, after all the cross or the appearance of christ is hardly central to our religion".

".....we did have some spare clay so we gave him breasts."

"It wasn't my idea,,,,honest"

"help!"