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I live in a pretend hole in an MDF skirting board in an artificial reproduction theme pub where they have tribute bands playing for cowboys who drink lager.

And you nest in synthetic bedding. And you eat peanuts, which aren't really nuts at all, they're legumes. And you have imaginary friends and spend your days in a virtual reality world wondering if you're awake or dreaming... Or is that me I'm confusing you with?